With my dear little friend, Toucan,
at Wadestown Primary School
in Wellington, New Zealand.
Toucan and I try to hypnotise
the children of St Peters Primary
School in Brisbane, Australia.
And this is how I read aloud . . .
"Give us an animal! And an activity!" Well, the audience threw us the awkward combination of a chinchilla (huh?) and golf. This is what we came up with, in a fretful 20 minutes (well, Sarah was cool as a cucumber; I was sweating like a cornered ferret, my mind fizzing horribly with painful fireworks):
Priscilla Chinchilla prepared for her swing -
golfing was really a ferretish thing -
others would try it; they'd begged and they'd pleaded.
But no-one could swing it EXACTLY as she did.
What glory it was to be born a chinchilla!
What fortune! What joy! An absolute thriller!
But just as she swung, at that moment of focus,
down came a thunderous swarming of locusts!
Nine angry bugs came down from the sky,
and gone was her club in the blink of an eye!
Then gone was the grass-
and the tee - and the ball -
till NOTHING was left of the fairway at all.
"WHY ME?" cried Priscilla, "WHAT have I done?
You locusts have ruined my great hole-in-one!
How spiteful! How mean!" And she fell to the ground,
with ferretish sobs (a rather odd sound).
In one buzzing voice, neither spiteful nor mean,
the locusts cried "Give us a turn on the green!
You hogged it, young ferret; you forced us to fight,
for GOLF's an inviolable Animal Right."
And so she reformed, that young golfing pro,
and kindly allowed other creatures a go.
And a golfer more great there has never been born,
than Priscilla, who coached all those locusts till dawn."
© Juliette MacIver 2015