Image: Titahi Bay
I perused a few other "About Me" blurbs to get an idea of how it's done, and I have gleaned that it is clearly not enough to be a mere author: everyone, it seems, is brimming with talent in many diverse areas. I also figured it is best to write in the third person, so you sound important enough to have other people writing about you. So here is my own very truthful account of myself:
Juliette MacIver is a children’s book author, trapeze artist, amateur cardio-thoracic surgeon, and mother of 14. She holds down three husbands, one of whom is her own, and is considering adding a fourth. In her spare time, she runs a successful smuggling business, and is a keen anthropomorphisist. She can speak with the creatures of the sea and air, and has had some success in dispersing clouds, especially on windy days. She has travelled to every country in the world, including some that don't even exist, and has addressed audiences all over the globe on the importance of staying local. A strong advocate for putting things off and doing as little as possible, she believes that a person’s worth should not be measured by their achievements. In spite of this, she has twice been nominated for the Orange Nobel Laureate Academy Highest Achiever Ever Award, and is desperate to win it. A fierce activist, she has fought viciously for peace all over the earth. She lives in a shoe in the quiet corner of a nursery rhyme.
In Real Life, I have four children and only one solitary husband. We live on this beach in a house made of sticks. (Well, we live close to this beach. In a house made of wood.) Sometimes I take a thermos of coffee and write my stories sitting right here on the beach. I have a Master of Arts in linguistics and three other useful talents: I can do the splits, sing a folk song backwards, and solve the Rubik’s cube blindfolded. I am excessively pleased about this last one. It took me a long time to learn and I had to put off a lot of writing to do it.
Juliette MacIver is a children’s book author, trapeze artist, amateur cardio-thoracic surgeon, and mother of 14. She holds down three husbands, one of whom is her own, and is considering adding a fourth. In her spare time, she runs a successful smuggling business, and is a keen anthropomorphisist. She can speak with the creatures of the sea and air, and has had some success in dispersing clouds, especially on windy days. She has travelled to every country in the world, including some that don't even exist, and has addressed audiences all over the globe on the importance of staying local. A strong advocate for putting things off and doing as little as possible, she believes that a person’s worth should not be measured by their achievements. In spite of this, she has twice been nominated for the Orange Nobel Laureate Academy Highest Achiever Ever Award, and is desperate to win it. A fierce activist, she has fought viciously for peace all over the earth. She lives in a shoe in the quiet corner of a nursery rhyme.
In Real Life, I have four children and only one solitary husband. We live on this beach in a house made of sticks. (Well, we live close to this beach. In a house made of wood.) Sometimes I take a thermos of coffee and write my stories sitting right here on the beach. I have a Master of Arts in linguistics and three other useful talents: I can do the splits, sing a folk song backwards, and solve the Rubik’s cube blindfolded. I am excessively pleased about this last one. It took me a long time to learn and I had to put off a lot of writing to do it.